startredder@hotmail.com (MSN)

Fanlistings, Cliques, and Other Stuff

Reading Lirael, As You Like It, The English Patient, Heart of Darkness, Suikoden III, Candidate for Goddess

Watching House, Rick Mercer's Monday Report, Gilmore Girls, Scrubs, Corner Gas, Aishiteruze Baby, Prince of Tennis, Hikaru no Go

Playing The Bard's Tale, Katamari Damacy, Curse of Monkey Island, Final Fantasy VI, Disgaea: Hour of Darkness, Pretty Barbie Dressup Party Final Fantasy X-2(group gaming)

Back-burner Star Ocean: Till the End of Time, Star Ocean: The Second Story, Final Fantasy Tactics: Advance, Baldur's Gate: Tales of the Sword Coast, Planescape: Torment, Final Fantasy VII

Obsessing Firefly, Erik and Ray, Impulse/Bart Allen, Ford Prefect, Monkey Island, Nostalgia.

Upcoming Things of Importance
January 5 First day of classes
January 14 Birthday party
January 16 Jaryn and Matt Are Old Day

Ninja and Roommate
Crack for Crack
Story and Art Journal
Mythical Detective Loki Screencap Recaps
Prince of Tennis Screencap Recaps

Previous Games

American Gods
Carnival of Bargain Madness
Grumpy Gamer
The International House of Mojo
Logic and Chaos
Worm Blog

scented // midnight rain

Is by Meimi, that wonderful Goddess who brings joy and happiness to the hearts of Ingrids.
This time, Meimi brought joy by doing a layout of Isumi Shinichirou and Waya Yoshitaka, of Hikaru no Go. It is full of wub.


5/17/2003 11:31:46 PM
In an attempt to avoid thinking, I've been trying to keep busy. That's been rather hard. I've basically just been watching all the anime I have at my disposal. A lot of Kodomo no Omocha and a lot of Trigun.

Basically, I called for my marks, and I did poorly. Maybe good enough for some things, but for someone who wants to get into the college of vetrinary medicine, they are far from suitable.

My mum thinks I should switch my focus. She does not say "give up because you're too stupid to ever get in" but she's probably thinking it. I know I am.

I don't know how good I really am in english. For all I know, the 98% on that in class essay was a fluke, the 90% average in class the result of lenient marking. What do I know? Nothing. It could all be some horrible fluke. Maybe I am really good, and don't have to try to make decent marks in that kind of thing. Bores me silly, though, makes me frequently homicidal.

I'm lost. I don't know what to do anymore. I've only ever really wanted to do one thing, and without that to guide me, I don't know what else to do. I'm not very good at anything, I'm basically talentless and not really bright, and I just don't know where to go or what to do anymore and it's really upsetting me. I don't like feeling lost, and even more, I hate having to say "I give up" and "I can't do it". I don't want to back down, I want to try and bash down whatever's in my way with my damn head, but I can't, and that just makes me even more depressed.

I don't know what to do. I don't really want to do anything. The only thing I want to do, I can't, because I'm not smart enough. Nothing else interests me.

Maybe I should just say "Fuck it" and get a bloody job at McDonalds. I'm beginning to get the feeling that whatever I continue to do will just be a waste of time and money.

I have nothing to drive me now, and that's depressing beyond words. I just want to lie down and make the universe go away, because there's no reason to bother when all I have in my life is misery, and depression, and more self-loathing than I can express.

There ends your depressing ramble for the night. Sigh.

5/15/2003 07:57:04 AM
Meimi there are not words for how messed up your school seems at times.

And Jonathan's shortness is -part- of his sexy adorableness (says the person who's barely over five feet tall). You have to love short guys. Although this could all be blamed on the fact that one of the first episodes of Buffy I ever saw was "Superstar". Mrrr. Jonathan. ^_^ Jinxer even made me a new AIM icon. Mwaha.

And no worries about the cds. I know (far too well) the pain of the schizoid burner.

Also - new layout? So sexy. Although I still can't believe she went back to face-sucking broody two-dimensional after they shared a -moment-. Blah.


Pancake breakfast was not. False advertising, my dad's a lying bastard. Was toast and omlette and thingies. No pancakes. Boo.

5/15/2003 12:38:32 AM
I could say something intelligent. I could say something about beating Stephen's ass in pool tonight. I could angst, or comment on how I like coconut ice cream, and it soothes my soul. I could mention I have to get up in about six hours to go to a pancake breakfast at the pen. I could talk about what I think of the latest developments on Buffy, or go into a rambling discussion about norse mythology, and how it pertains to Mythical Detective Loki (I will, at some point, along with my commentary on the characters in Suikoden and Suikoden III, and the bit about McDohl having a harem).

But instead, I'll say this. It's not the sort of thing I say really often. But. Danny Strong (Buffy the Vampire Slayer's Jonathan) is incredibly gorgeous. He has the most beautiful eyes imagineable, and is just really attractive and sexy. I've known this, but skimming over some pictures because, uh, I was just kind of wandering, I came across some shots from the wrap party. I gave Jinxer the link, and moved on. A little bit later, -she- commented on his eyes, and I went back, and proceeded to stare for several minutes. Really, just bloody gorgeous. You can keep James Marsters, and Anthony Stewart Head, and whoever else you like. Danny Strong is just damn fine to look at.

5/14/2003 01:40:26 AM
I've told him already, but it bears repeating, that Stephen made my night. Definitely adds to my belief that the things that really make me smile are just things that are randomly nice. Like Stephen plugging the Loki Screencaps on his livejournal. Yeah, I'm a dork, but that, and the rest of tonight's conversation, just left me smiling. A big relief, since my day was kind of bleh - wrote eight pages, which leaves me a total exhausted mess, but didn't get the usual squeeings 'cause people are busy (I also didn't get massively warned by Jinxer - very surprised).

I know I'm a dork, shut up, and let me be happy about stupid little things.

5/11/2003 11:31:09 PM
So, I finally figured it out. The fact of the matter is that sex is to God what Seinfeld is/was to your average television viewing North American.

Make of that what you will. It would probably help if you knew what I thought about Seinfeld.

I like to keep you in suspense.

Also, since I'm on the wacky metaphor train - DWJ versus That Evil Hell Woman Who I Want To Kill.

Reading a book by the latter is like eating a photo of a cookie. Reading a book by the former, however, is like eating a perfectly normal looking cookie, only to find out afterwards that it has somehow managed to pack the punch of the best six-course-meal of your life, without causing you to gain any weight, making chemicals fluctuate oddly, altering your metabolism, or causing you to lack essential vitamins and nutrients.

No, really, I'm not exagerating.


The people at the University of Saskatchewan Residence Office would be happier people if they'd just stop making my life difficult.

No, they haven't done anything wrong. Yet. But I've been practising "I'll have my lawyer contact you", which can give you hints as to what I'm going to be doing tomorrow.

I hate telephones.

I'd be a happier person if my parents would occupy themselves that -wasn't- a political scandal currently making the national news. 'cause, man, it gets boring hearing about it all the time, and I wish people would stop calling and showing up on the doorstep to talk about it.

Also, it prompts many amusing comments from my mum, none of which I can share. That's sad.